Guilty Fabulous

Nickelback Played at the Halftime Show, and the World Didn't End

I don't like Nickelback, and I was pretty indifferent when I heard that they would be playing at today's Thanksgiving halftime show. Other people had some stronger opinions about that.

I guess, since the Detroit Lions actually have a winning record or something, people now suddenly care about the turkey day entertainment. A Change.org petition went out, Mayer Hawthorne had an alternative halftime show, and I saw a ton of people complaining. They are generic! They're Canadian! They suck, and I don't understand how they sell records! Now that the Lions are doing well, we clearly deserved Kid Rock or some homegrown talent.

Well, Nickelback wasn't replaced. They played. And you know what? It wasn't that big of a deal. You see, while Detroit has been the birthplace of some amazing talent and music, it turns out we pretty much let anyone play here who wants to. Being in Detroit means some of the best musicians in the world come to my hometown and I get to see them live. And a lot of musicians I don't care for come here, as well, and their fans see them, too.

When it came to show time, eh. It was Nickelback. I am sure some people liked it. But, it is not the focus of my day.

Since it is Thanksgiving, my thoughts go toward what I am thankful for. I am thankful that the Lions have been doing reasonably well, that the food was outstanding, that I have amazing friends and family, and that I still have enough dignity to be writing this from the comfort of my home rather than setting up camp at Best Buy.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Also, I appreciate that Nickelback had a sense of humor about it. If they had played as the Four Nickels and all worn Robocop costumes, that would have been possibly the best thing ever.

There's a New Bar in Ferndale, and It's Love at First Sip!

Last Friday night, I was celebrating a good friend's birthday - two divas having a night out. We started at the Emory, went to the Loving Touch, then I had an idea. I was desperately hoping that The Oakland Art Novelty Company had opened its doors. I'd heard a 20's style speakeasy was supposed to be opening soon, and I was hoping it was soft launched by now.

My friend and I walked over, and there were people smoking outside (we took that as a good sign). We walked in, opened the door and BAM! Chandeliers, ornate furniture and a touch of glam. My friend just kept saying over and over, "This is so awesome! It's just so awesome." A lovely server in a vintage dress gave us menus with cocktails divided by the type of liquor used. We placed our orders, and before we knew it we were savoring these amazing cocktails. Some of the ingredients seemed a little strange, but I'm always up for adventure.

We decided we wanted to order another drink, and I wanted to try something else. My friend loved her drink, so she wanted to stick with it. The server looked puzzled and asked if we were there for the event. Event??? She explained that it was an invite-only friends and family event and it was the first night they had opened their doors. Invitees got to order two drinks of their choice for free, but they had to be different cocktails. She had two passes left, so she checked to see if us event crashers could have them. She came back, said it was cool and we each ordered our second drink. I felt a little awkward, but also like the luckiest lass in Ferndale.

The drinks I enjoyed were the Valencia Nightcap and the Mint Julep - completely different from one another and each outstanding. I especially liked the first one though.

If you are interested in going, you don't have to crash a party like I did. For the next couple of weeks, the place is reservations only and cash only. So get all dolled up and check it out! I might be going with one of my friends (if we can pick a night), so you might see me there. I think I will wear a vintage dress this time...seems like an excellent excuse.

You can find out more on Facebook and Twitter.

Lush Supports Gay Marriage and Makes Me Smell Awesome - Double Win

People who know me know that I absolutely support gay marriage rights. When Michigan voted to include discrimination into our constitution, I decided I would not pursue a legal marriage until that was rectified. The idea of getting married while my LGBT friends and family cannot appalls me.

Now my favorite store in the whole wide world for bath and body products is raising awareness in an amazing way! Lush Cosmetics is hosting a fantastic event at their stores.

At 11:38 a.m. tomorrow, they are bringing attention to the 1,138 rights denied to gay couples because of DOMA (and other state laws). They are encouraging folks to kiss at their stores nationwide at the stroke of 22 minutes to noon. You can stand by other loving couples and show your support.

While you are there, pick up the Freedom Foamer bubble bar - it's green, it's sparkly, and proceeds go to the Why Marriage Matters campaign.

Get more information at http://www.lushusa.com!

Some Thoughts for Folks Enjoying NKOTBSB Tonight

As I was driving home, and "Step by Step" came on. It was awesome; it really took me back.

When I was little, I had a Jordan doll. He was very popular with my Barbies. Ken didn't stand a chance!

For all those at the show, have fun tonight!

Reason 752 Why Samuel L. Jackson is the Best Person Ever

There's this children's book for parents called "Go the F**k to Sleep." Samuel L. Jackson reads the audio version of it, and it truly captures the frustration of getting a kid to go to bed. His performance nails it. I am not a mom, but I have been a very involved auntie and I have totally been there.

Listen to it via Geek Tyrant

What I Learned on Vacation

As some of you know, I was in Europe the last half of May/early June. I had an amazing time. I was on a Mediterranean cruise with my boyfriend and his family.

Long plane rides, customs, and different cultures teach you many things. Here's what I learned about the guilty side during my adventures overseas.

1. The Addictive Power of Angry Birds

Well, I played Angry Birds well before this trip. My niece plays it on my phone and so do I. It's a mindless way to spend time while waiting in line, etc. I never expected my boyfriend would get into the game.

Then we were waiting at the airport in Philly. Angry Birds is on his brother's iPad and on my Droid. The peer pressure was too much for him to bear and he put it on his iTouch. He played it the entire cruise, during every single bit of downtime he had. By the third day, he was well past where I was, and I've been playing off and on for months.

Rest assured, he hasn't played since the trip - but that's mostly because it is on his iTouch and not his phone. Please, no one tell him about Angry Birds Rio or Angry Birds Seasons!

2. Customs Agents <3 80's Music

How would I know that? When coming back to the United States, I stood in line for customs before retrieving my checked luggage. I gave the dude my passport, and he asks me why I was travelling. I told him I was on a cruise with my boyfriend's family in my very sweet, innocent, I-don't-want-to-spend anymore-time-here-than-I-have-to-cause-I-am-tired-and-want-to-go-home voice. He then asks me when I was last arrested. Yes, that's right, when I was last arrested. I responded that I have never been arrested, which is true. He then asked me if I was a "good girl" and recited part of the Adam Ant classic "Goody Two Shoes." "You don't drink, don't smoke, what do you do?" As a true lover of 80's music, I joined him on the rest of the refrain, and was on my way.

3. If You Hassle Someone about Karaoke, the Karaoke Gods Will Force You to Sing

The band on the ship was hosting a karaoke with the band thing (except there was no screen, no cues for people who don't know music, so it really wasn't karaoke). The problem for me? Due to the average age of folks on this ship (57), I was at least 20 years too young to know most of the songs well. My boyfriend's dad did not see what the problem was, and started suggesting simple songs I could sing...that were recorded in the 60's. Again, I was familiar with the songs, but not enough to sing them. After I did a tortured version of "Walk Like an Egyptian" (at least it has a dance), I got the entire audience and my boyfriend's family to persuade his Dad to try his hand at a song. His dad and I ended up singing the worst possible performance of "We Are Family" ever sung. We missed every musical cue and it was amazing. :-D

4. Souvenir Shot Glasses from Greece are Ridiculous

You know how some people collect shot glasses? Well, I was looking for some to bring back. Now, most are made in China or somewhere that has nothing to do with where you are visiting. That doesn't bother me. What does bother me is when you look at a shot glass on one island with a recognizable picture of where you are at (with the city or island name on it), and then you visit the next location and the exact same image is on the shot glasses with a different city name. Super lame!

Obviously, while visiting foreign countries, I learned a lot more than this kind of thing. However, since this space is reserved for the guilty, that's what I will write about here. ;-)

The Charlie Sheen Can't Handle the Truth Tour

Charlie Sheen came to Detroit over the weekend for his show at the Fox. I was unwilling to fork over my hard earned cash to watch his incoherent rants live (the Web is enough, thanks), but there was plenty of reporting to get the gist of what happened and why sane Detroiters walked out of the show.

Sheen, being a torpedo of truth as opposed to a sane voice of reason, decided that it was Detroit's fault for not liking him and decided to complain about his experience in Detroit in Chicago. How cute!

Mr. Sheen, if you are listening or care, here are some things you should probably not do during a live show in my fine city if you expect people, who work hard for their money, to appreciate it:

1. Do not bring Simon Rex on stage to rap - Detroit is a city known for music. We lay claim to 10% of the musicians in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. We have Eminem, and you bring an MTV VJ from the 90's to rap on stage? Seriously? What you should have done was have a Spring Break intermission where Simon Rex could have hosted a wet t-shirt contest or something MTV-style. It would have at least been more fitting. News flash: Detroit has good taste in music, and we keep it real.

2. What works online does not work on stage - As you reminded your booing audience, you already had their money. People actually paid for this show because they thought you might be entertaining or worth listening to. Instead, you ranted incoherently and bored the audience. Couldn't you at least come up with some good pre-written rants and organize them so people could pretend they make sense? Maybe the goddesses can help you with that.

Oh, and despite the fact you made changes to your Chicago show based on the response in Detroit, you are still complaining about Detroit. You obviously know we were right, so you'd sound less desperate if you stopped complaining about Detroiters asking for a refund.

I think I know why it was called the Torpedo of Truth tour - because Charlie Sheen can't help but bomb.

What's a Real Housewife? Take the Poll!

The Real Housewives of (insert large U.S. city here) was originally created as a reality spin-off of Desperate Housewives. The concept was following real affluent housewives.

I've watched this show off and on, but one thing always gets to me is they aren't all housewives.

Maybe there is a different definition applied to rich reality TV stars, but:

• Don't you have to be a wife to qualify as a housewife? There have been several instances of women on this show not being wives, not being in a committed relationship or any sort of wifely situation so to speak. So how do you get cast on a show about housewives?
• How do we define "housewife" in terms of role in the family? Generally, a housewife means a woman with a partner who stays home to tend to children and household needs, and sometimes works part-time outside of the home to support her spouse's job or to earn some extra income. Many of these women on the show, however, have careers in their own right and have a large role outside of their homes. 

Why not call it "Working Moms of New York" or "Affluent Women of Beverly Hills"? What are your thoughts? Any true fans want to comment?

Take the poll!

Celebrity Apprentice update in the works!

What You Should've Said: Celebrity Apprentice - Lisa Rinna Edition

Dear Lisa Rinna,

They were throwing you under the bus from the very beginning on this episode of Celebrity Apprentice, and you knew it. Dionne Warwick's classically-aged behind should have been kicked to the curb. Alas, you failed to control your own narrative, and you went home for it.

Had you been able to control the story from the start, you would have put Star Jones and Dionne in the hot seat. Here's the story you should have told from the beginning of the boardroom.

1. Dionne was demanding and convinced that her theme was the best. She talked over Marlee Matlin and hushed Niki Taylor when they had other ideas or felt her theme was generic and inappropriate for the age group (4 and 5 year olds will always be themselves). Since the majority of the team was behind the theme, you went with it. Dionne was extraordinarily difficult to work with even after the team went with her theme.

2. Because Nene Leakes and Star were behind Dionne's concept and because you felt Star was a competent communicator, you put them in charge of the book while you, the actress, focused on the performance aspect. Unfortunately, Star was uncomfortable even approving a cover without you despite the clear delegation.

3. The best part of the task was the performance. The ones who should go home are those who put themselves above everyone else (Dionne) and those who could not handle delegated tasks (Star). The team put you in charge as a performer, and you did what you were expected to do. Star's contention that leaders should do all of the work and not delegate according to talent is ridiculous, and Dionne's clear belief that her opinion is above all others because she is old and obnoxious is counterproductive and impossible to work with.

Well, at least you can be comforted by the fact that team ASAP now has to put up with Dionne Warwick's ancient diva attitude going forward, and I'm certain that will serve as severe punishment.

Sincerely,

Laura

P.S. Marlee Matlin and Niki Taylor need an alliance now-ish.

P.P.S. I am finding Dionne Warwick to be pretty unwatchable, but at least Gary Busey will be a team leader next week. That will be awesome!

Play Farmville? Use Your Guilty Pleasure to Help Relief Efforts in Japan!

I don't personally play Farmville or any of the Zynga games, they're just not my thing. But I know plenty of folks that love them, and that's okay!

So, if this is one of your guilty pleasures, you have a unique opportunity to help Japan.

As you most likely know, Japan was devastated by an earthquake and tsunami last week. To help out, Zynga teamed up with Save the Children to raise money for their Japan Earthquake Emergency Fund. Learn more about the Daikon Radishes you can purchase in Farmville to support relief efforts.

Other Zynga games are offering similar opportunities to help. So if you play Cityville or any of their other games, you can help, too! Get more information about the opportunities available in other Zynga games.

Many are also texting $10 donations to the Red Cross by texting "RedCross" to 90999. If you can afford to, please donate.